MathiasCavanaugh.com

Every day I get new followers on Twitter.  I do follow back most (>50%), but I don’t follow back many for various reasons.  Here are the 10 most likely reasons you didn’t get a follow back.

10. You’re a political hack who likes to spout off your ignorant, unresearched, unfounded thoughts on a regular basis.  Note: I’m not on Twitter to listen to such things.
9. You’re obviously just collecting Twitter followers as some sort of meaningless trophy to boost your ego (I.e. you follow 100K people and have 100K followers)
8. A look at your recent history shows you only talk about yourself, don’t RT, or converse with others.
7. Your tweets or profile make it clear you think that Christians are evil, brainwashed people.
6. You tweet 300x an hour, 20 hours a day.
5. The only thing you tweet about is SEO.
4. Your twitter icon is essentially porn.
3. Not only did you follow me, but you immediately sent me a DM making sure I know it and asking when I am going to “return the favor”.
2. Every tweet you make is “Buy my [book/product]”
1. NOTHING you say interests me.

Ah, yes, Twitter.  140 characters to say whatever it is that is on your mind.  But are you guilty of any of these five major Twitter fails?  Maybe it is time to rethink your life.

1. Demanding someone follow you in order for you to follow them.

Really?  You have so little that is interesting to say that you have to bribe people to follow you?  Shame.

2. Following someone, waiting for them to follow you, and then unfollowing them.

Can’t drum up followers any other way huh? Read more…

A good Monday morning to these new twitter followers!

Jeff Joseph Author‏@author_jeff

Author of the Romantic Thriller THE TRIALS OF VIRTUE http://amzn.to/yrbBOX Working on my next book series available 2012. Learning is a continuous process!

Patrick Satters‏@Patrick_Satters

Passionate #fantasy #author, who tries to surprise the reader with originalty and unexpected plot twists. Working on his debut novel Fateful Bet [Project Title]

Andy Lucas‏@Rysamoke

Husband, father and eternal optimist! I write novels, poetry & screenplays. Love my wife/kids, horses, dogs, motorcycles and visiting USA/Canada.

Follow

Linda Poitevin‏@lindapoitevin

Author of The Grigori Legacy, where police procedural meets angel mythology. Wife, mother, gardener, coffee snob. Twisted sense of humor. Prone to random tweets

Melissa Foster‏@Melissa_Foster

Mom to 6, author @TheWomensNest addict LOVE mint chocochip, brownies, books, being happy☼ helping others #WLCAuthor #ShareTheLove4authors @FosteringSucess

E.C. Belikov‏@ECBelikov

Sci-Fi Writer. Gamer. Amateur MMA fighter. Geek. Изучаем русский.

Murray Hunter‏@DalastKimbasabi

Im still doing things people gave up years ago. Also educator, entrepreneur, researcher, farmer, hack of a runner, wannabe philosopher, & author.

David Taylor‏@DSTaylor1

The only wannabe author on Twitter, who doesn’t know how to use Twitter (well actually I think I’ve got the hang of it now!)

Lisa Bouchard‏@Lisa_Bouchard

Urban Fantasy and Science Fiction writer living in New Hampshire. I wake up ridiculously early to make sure I get work done before the kids get up.

Christine Nolfi‏@christinenolfi

Contemporary fiction author of Treasure Me, The Tree of Everlasting Knowledge and Second Chance Grill.

Jayde Scott‏@JaydeScottBooks

Author of the Ancient Legends series. I follow back and unfollow everyone who doesn’t follow back. No kidding!

Hurlock Oxford‏@hurlockkvemz3

Stacy-Deanne‏@stacydeanne

Award-winning novelist of crime fiction, mysteries, and romantic suspense. The Season of Sin Available now!http://www.stacydeanne1.wordpress.com

Joseph Mitchell‏@JosephMitchell_

I write scifi/fantasy. I love computers and gaming and other nerdy stuff. I make computer animations as a hobby, and I’m also a lifelong movie fan/geek.

German Sanchez ‏@Germanrsanchez

German R. Sanchez is the author of the imaginative book, I Dream In Haiku and is planning to write more Haiku books. http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008B59V4M/

ELLIE‏@ghsel

Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life#TeamFollowBack

Steve Umstead‏@SteveUmstead

Science fiction author of top-rated Gabriel Trilogy. Semiprofessional swim-up bar tester, maniacal iPhone user. NEW Gabriel: Zero Point: http://amzn.to/GZPtw

Brandon Charles West‏@fortoldon

Author of the Scarlet Hopewell series of books for young adults, including Scarlet & the Dragon’s Burden. Father, firefighter and avid reader

Ok, let’s get a few things straight shall we?

I do not exist on Twitter to please you

There seems to be a common misconception among some, perhaps many, on Twitter that other people exist to please and serve them.  This is simply not true when it comes to me.  I am not on Twitter to specifically help you out.  This does not mean that I won’t help you out mind you.  It simply means that it is not my primary duty.

The best way to get me to retweet one of your tweets is to tweet something interesting

Look, I know you want to promote your book(s).  Some of you REALLY promote the heck out of them.  Kudos!  But if every Tweet you make is just another schleping of your book then I’m not really going to be all that enthused to hit the little retweet button.

Constantly begging for a retweet does not make me more interested in retweeting something

I get it!  You want a retweet!  Retweets mean mentions and mentions means more popularity.  We all want that.  But honestly?  Constantly opening your Tweets with requests for retweets makes you look desperate.  And I still only retweet when I find something interesting so the begging doesn’t help.

Just because you follow me does not mean I will follow you back

There is a sizable community on Twitter who feel, with all their heart, that just because they follow someone, said someone must follow them back.  I have heard these sorts of people refer to those who don’t automatically follow them back as “Twitter snobs”, implying that these sorts think they are too good for other people.  I find this however as simply an excuse they make for not being popular enough to warrent tons of people following them without reciprication.  These people are upset that they just cannot come up with something interesting to say to make people want to follow them.  Look, I do follow back a lot of people who follow me, especially if you are fellow author.

Yes, I MIGHT actually be interested in reading your latest book

If you write High/Epic Fantasy it is possible that I might be interested in reading your latest book.  Sci-fi too.  But, here’s the thing, I’m an author myself who also works a day job and has a family.  Plus I already read quite a lot.  Ok, now you understand why I probably can’t?  Want to know the best way to get me to read your book?  Have an audio version of it available.  I know most people don’t, but with 2 hours to kill every day during a commute that is my time to read and audio books make it much, much easier on me.

If you ask for a review, I will only give honest reviews

Warning!  Warning!  If you ask me to read your book, short story, or whatever and review it, I will give an honest review.  I don’t like people who blow smoke up my ass and I don’t blow smoke up other people’s asses either.  Over the years, people have commented to me how much better my writing has gotten.  You know how it got better?  It got better because when something was wrong and sucked people told  If you don’t want an honest book review don’t ask for one at all.

I don’t follow Twitter spammers

If you make 100 Tweets a day and each one of them is for the purpose of telling me how great your latest e-book is or a plea to buy it, I probably won’t follow you back.  But I do look at your recent tweets and see if you are saying anything other than “BUY MY BOOK!” in them before I click that follow button.

I’m sorry if you get offended by something I Tweet

But let’s get one thing straight.  I am not sorry I Tweeted it.  I am just sorry for you that you were offended by it.  Just click unfollow and go on your merry way.

Yes, I admit it!  I have a new pet peeve.  It is people who spam twitter with 20 or 30 tweets in the course of 3 minutes either saying the exact same thing, variations of the same thing or promoting something!   ARRRGH!  I get it!  You have a book you want to promote!